|"A Different Kind Of Knight" (1/1, NC-17) [TMF]
||[Apr. 15th, 2008|09:04 pm]
From The Ashes
Title: A Different Kind Of Knight
Author: jainadurron and jediprincessdsv
Rating: NC-17 for graphic sexual situations
Timeframe: Future AU
Characters: Anna Ellsworth Winchester, Sam Winchester
Genre: angst, adult, crossover
Summary: Sam and Anna address their new "relationship" after she runs into an old friend. SPN/CSI crossover.
Author's Notes: Events referenced in this 'fic take place in "Lay Me To Sleep", an as-yet unposted "From The Ashes" story. Lyrics and title are from "Different Kind Of Knight" by Kane. Nick Stokes and Catherine Willows belong to CBS. (This 'fic is part of an AU spin-off from "From The Ashes". This and all other stories marked "[TMF]" are part of that series, not the main "From The Ashes" one.)
Previous In Series
She said "Promise me you'll take it slow
And swear no talk of tomorrow
And when you feel me tighten around you
Well, you can let the hammer down"
And I got a paint outside with enough giddyup
To be free
I got a faint smell of cheap perfume
And a hint of gasoline
See I'm a different kind of knight
You're gonna find your fairy tales are all lies
I don't have a white horse
But you can come along for the ride
-- Kane, "Different Kind Of Knight"
In June, not long before her 27th birthday, Anna told Sam that she needed a few days to herself; it was getting claustrophobic with just the two of them all the time, with the tension there that kept building, because she was hesitant about sharing a bed again after that first time. His stomach wound had become infected, which kept him flat on his back for a week, and then her period had followed that--which had been a minor relief, as she'd realised only after they'd slept together that they hadn't used protection--and they just hadn't found the time since.
Anna felt like climbing the walls. Dean had been gone for almost five months, and Anna was afraid that everything building up inside of her would explode out at Sam if she didn't get away from him for even just a few days. She'd only felt like that with Dean in the beginning, but it hadn't been quite as bad because Sam had been there as a buffer when things got particularly bad. There was no neutral buffer now, and sometimes they wore on each other.
He dropped her off in Vegas on the way to a reported demonic possession in Death Valley. Sam had given in to her proposal when she said that it wouldn't be a good idea to get Mariah anywhere near the demon, since the reports were particularly gruesome. She relished the idea of being normal for a few days, just a single mom and her toddler on the loose in Las Vegas.
Not that there was much for her to do there, with a baby in tow, but she managed. She was on her second day, wandering through the mall at Caesar's Palace with Mariah in her stroller, when she heard a voice call her name.
Anna turned and saw a tall, familiar figure approaching. "Nick! Hi!"
Nick Stokes grinned and looked her up and down. "You back in town, huh? You changed your hair."
She fingered her dark blonde locks. "Yeah, the other was too wild for me. I'm just here for a couple of days. Sam ditched me here while he . . . checks something in California."
The CSI's warm brown eyes were sharp. "Just Sam? I never did meet the infamous Dean."
Anna felt the familiar twist in her gut, but it wasn't quite so painful now. She was starting to get used to the idea that Dean was gone. "My, uh, husband died back in February. The day before Valentine's, if you can believe it."
"Oh." Nick was taken aback. "I'm so sorry. Was it a . . .?"
"Creepy-crawly?" she finished. "No. He was mugged as we were leaving our hotel in Florida." She swallowed the lump in her throat and said, "He gave the man his wallet, but the guy shot him, anyway."
She cleared her throat and forced a brighter tone. "But, we're doing okay. Surviving."
"Good," he said softly. "That's good. So, uh, what are you doin' while you're in town?"
She shrugged. "Just doing some shopping, maybe play some Keno at one of the buffets. Not much else I can do with the kid in tow."
Nick glanced down at Mariah, who was gnawing on the Minnie Mouse doll Dean had bought her in Florida. "Hi," he said.
She blinked up at him, just staring.
"She's not used to strangers," Anna said. "But she's not really shy. Takes after Dean that way."
He nodded. "I can see that. Hey, I got an idea. I've got the night off . . . you maybe wanna see if Catherine's daughter would be interested in babysitting? We could go to dinner."
Anna hesitated. She couldn't deny that she'd been a little attracted to the Texan the last time they'd been here. She knew he'd been attracted to her; he'd told her as much at the club she'd "worked" at.
Seeing her face, he held up his hands. "Hey. Just as friends. Catch up an' all of that. You saved my life, it's the least I could do, anyway."
Ultimately, his grin was as hard to resist as a Winchester's. "Okay. That sounds good. I could stand some adult company."
It was a little weird, putting Mariah's car-seat in Nick's SUV. She'd walked to Caesar's Palace with Mariah, but for a just-in-case, she'd pulled the car seat base from the backseat of the Impala. It had been a standard procedure since the time Dean had been arrested and the Impala impounded in Maryland.
Catherine Willows, who apparently had paperwork and would be in the office all evening, informed them when they arrived at the crime lab that her daughter was at a play rehearsal, but that she'd be happy to watch Mariah for a few hours.
"Are you sure?" Anna asked. "I don't want to inconvenience-"
Mariah, who was up and out of her carrier, had picked up a ceramic duck off a low table, and promptly dropped it on the linoleum.
There was a moment of silence, then Catherine made a high-pitched sound and clapped her hands over her mouth. Mariah, in a perfect imitation of her father, said, "Woops."
Anna picked Mariah up and checked her for injuries. "I am so sorry-" she began, but stopped when she realised that Catherine wasn't *crying, she was laughing.
"Cath?" Nick asked.
Catherine wiped a tear from her reddened face and managed, "I have been trying to figure out how to get rid of that for months! You can definitely leave her here, she's done me a huge favour."
"Oh." Anna sat Mariah on the couch and lovingly ran her fingers through her daughter's blonde hair. Her little girl nearly broke her heart sometimes with those freckles, and those green eyes.
"Mommy's going to visit with her friend Nick, and you're going to play with Catherine for a little while, okay?"
Mariah popped her thumb in her mouth and mumbled, "Okie-dokie."
Anna had to smile. Her child didn't have a very large vocabulary, at almost twenty months, but what words she did say were straight from the mouth of Dean Winchester. "I love you, baby," she whispered.
She kissed both of Mariah's cheeks and hugged her, then followed Nick out. Behind them, Catherine said, "Look, Mariah, here's another ducky to play with."
Anna looked up at Nick. "She isn't going to teach my daughter to break things, is she?"
"I shouldn't think so, but you never know."
Dinner was nice, if a little awkward because she felt she couldn't do a lot of shop talk. Her shop talk wasn't exactly near the realm of "normal". But human conversation outside of Sam, who was sometimes too quiet these days, was a change of pace she enjoyed. Still, she found herself missing Sam. And, of course, Dean. Him she'd probably never stop missing.
They picked up Mariah at the lab. Anna was pleased to find that Mariah had not broken any more ducks.
Nick drove her back to her motel and they sat for a moment in the parked car.
"So . . . turns out Grissom and Sara had a thing goin' on," he said. "But she left a couple months back, an' he hasn't been quite the same."
That news saddened Anna a little, but didn't surprise her. She'd told Grissom the last time she'd seen him that there was heartbreak ahead. "That's too bad. I like Gil."
"Yeah, he's a good guy."
Nick turned her way. He gazed at her for a few moments in the dark car, and then he leaned over and was kissing her.
She'd seen it coming from a mile away, his body language screaming his intent, and did nothing to stop him. He was so easy to read, and he really thought he'd like to see more of her, maybe keep her around, because she could take care of herself better than all the other women he'd seen.
Anna gently pushed him away, sighing as she broke the kiss. "Nick . . . no. I- You're a fantastic guy, and I'm very flattered, but I'm just not . . . ready yet. Dean hasn't even been gone six months." And there's Sam. Have to figure out what's going on there, the voice at the back of her mind said.
Nick let out a sigh of his own. "Yeah. I shoulda figured. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to push."
She smiled, touched his cheek, leaned in to give him a quick kiss. "Maybe another time. I'll pass through here again, I'm sure."
He helped her get the car seat and its base out of the back of the SUV and walked her to her door, two floors up.
"So, I guess . . . I'll see you around, in a while," he said.
"It was nice seeing you again, Nick." She grinned. "Don't purposely get yourself into trouble so it'll be sooner, okay?"
"Who, me? Nah."
He said good-night, and she let herself and the baby into the room.
And found Sam sitting on her bed, staring at her stonily.
"Sam," she said, when she'd recovered from the jolt of surprise. Anna set the carrier and the sleeping child on the floor.
He stood to his full height. "You sleep with him?"
Her jaw dropped. "What? Okay, first of all, Nick is a friend. And secondly, you have no right to ask that. It's my business if I did or didn't. You are not my husband. He died four months ago."
She knew the words were harsh when she said them, but the way he'd demanded . . .
Sam was ordinarily never violent with women, and he wasn't now, not exactly. But he backed her against the door and pinned her there with both hands on her shoulders as he leaned close.
"No right?" he repeated. "I thought we-"
Her anger fled at the hurt she saw in his eyes. "Sam. I didn't sleep with him. He took me to dinner, and we talked. Got caught up. I told him about Dean, he told me that he's still got side-effects from what the Fomorian did to him last year. Then he drove me back here. That's it."
Sam released her and raked a hand through his hair. "I saw you in the car. You were kissing."
Her stomach fell. He'd been that close, and she hadn't noticed? She'd let her guard down too much with Nick.
"He kissed me," she admitted. "And maybe I kissed him back . . . but I told him no."
Sam blinked at her, green eyes confused "You did?"
She shrugged. "I won't lie. I thought about it. He's a nice guy. He's got a stable job that's actually less dangerous than what we do. And he likes Mariah."
Anna put her hand on his arm, felt the tension there. "But I can't have normal, Sam. It's just not in the cards for either of us. I even . . . don't want normal."
There was a look of hope in his eyes she'd never really seen before. "Yeah?" He licked his lips. "What do you want?"
"Off the top of my head? For Dean to have not died. But I can't have that. As for the rest, I'm still figuring that out."
He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, to put himself back inside her comfort zone. "Yeah? Am I . . . in there somewhere?"
She reached out and hooked a finger in one of his belt loops, tugging him just a fraction closer. "Sam, I just turned down a hot guy who has fantasies of being my white knight, rescuing me and setting up white picket fences. What do you think?"
The decision was easier the second time, probably for having been there once before.
Sam lifted her, pressing her with his body against the door. She wrapped her legs around his lean hips and let out a shuddering sigh when his mouth skated past hers to lay kisses against her throat.
"Sam," she murmured. "Gotta put Mariah in her crib first."
He groaned in disappointment, feeling inclined to just take her against the door, right there. The very thought of it had him half-hard already, and it took an enormous effort to pull back. She slid down the length of his body and he had to stop himself from grabbing her and tossing her on the bed.
Anna quickly moved Mariah to her travel crib and made sure the mesh sides were covered. Her daughter was too young to understand, if she saw, but Anna didn't want her to see. It sort of felt like . . . being caught at it by Dean's spirit.
As she kicked off her shoes, the nice ones she'd worn to dinner, she wondered when she'd stop feeling guilty about this.
She'd managed to get the zipper done up the first time, but pulling it down was harder, and it got stuck about halfway. Sam had sprawled on one of the beds--the one she'd slept in, and she wondered if he knew that--so she sat on the edge and looked at him over her shoulder.
"Could you help me?"
He sat up slowly, a very male look in his eyes. He swept her long hair to the side and finished unzipping her black dress. He used his long fingers to push the wide straps off her shoulders, letting the bodice fall, exposing her black and red bra.
His big hands pulled her back onto the bed, so that she sat between his outstretched legs, and he leaned forward, pressing his lips to her shoulder as he unfastened the bra. A shudder went through her when he reached around to slide his hands under the fabric and cup her breasts. The little noise she made when he stroked her nipples was one he'd been hearing in his dreams since the first time they'd done this, and it turned his erection hard as steel.
She placed her hands over his, the lace and satin between them, and tipped her head back against his shoulder.
"You wear this for him, or did you know I'd be back tonight?" he rasped close to her ear.
Anna smiled, eyes still closed. "I wore it for me, because I like feeling sexy even if there's no one to wear it for. But I bought it for you."
It was a bit funny to admit that, that she was buying lingerie with him in mind, rather than Dean.
"Mmm." He nipped her earlobe. "Does the rest match?"
"Why don't you find out?"
"That means I have to let go," he said, with just a bit of a whine.
She laughed. "No, it doesn't."
After pulling her arms out of the top, Anna leaned against him and lifted her hips, so that Sam could push the dress off with one hand, keeping the other right where it was. She kicked it to the floor and turned in his arms, clad only in the loosened bra and its matching g-string.
"You like?" she asked.
He was a little tongue-tied; the little red triangle had a patch of black lace right over the place he really wanted to touch, drawing his attention like a mosquito to a bug zapper. That was kind of how he felt, like she'd electrocuted him.
"Wow," he said finally.
Anna toyed with the buttons on the front of his shirt, undoing them one by one as she knelt between his thighs.
Sam felt his hips attempting to surge off the bed, so he shoved his butt back down hard. Anna had most of the buttons open on his shirt, so he reached back for the neck of it and pulled it over his head and threw it to the right. Sam went for his undershirt, balled up and shot at the bathroom door like a three-pointer.
He breathed in rapidly a few times, almost snarling before attaching himself to her mouth again, kissing her with a fierce passion, like he wanted to lick any trace of that guy . . . that 'Nick' . . . out of her mouth.
He gentled his assault a little bit and pulled the bra away from her body, freeing her breasts to his mouth, pulling a pebbled nipple to his mouth so he could memorize what made her squirm and wriggle and gasp. Anna's back arched wantonly, presenting him with the thing he craved.
"You're . . . freakin' . . . gorgeous. Mmm," he told her, appreciating every inch of her exposed skin. His jealousy had surged, almost taken control of him when he saw her in the car with that . . . guy. He'd nearly jumped out of the room and pulled the bastard out of his truck to beat the shit out of him.
It didn't matter, now, though.
"Off." Anna tugged at his pants. "Now."
His cheeks flamed a little bit, mind going back to their first time together and how he'd left her high and dry. This time was going to be different.
"Hang on." He wormed out from under her and yanked his belt open, leaving it in the loops. He had to stand to get the offending item off, though, so he stood up quickly and pulled them open, age worn zipper nearly tearing off its tracks on the way down. Sam pushed them off his hips and sort of wiggled them downwards. One knee came up to free that foot from his pants, but he lost his balance in his hurry and tumbled over.
"Ow," came the muted sound from the floor. "I meant to, uh, do that."
Anna laughed, not too loudly, but the sound was musical to Sam. He pulled his feet out of his pants and shoved the boxers off for good measure before he hooked an elbow on the mattress and pulled himself back up. Anna giggled and kissed his temple, guiding him onto his back again and straddling his thighs.
She let her hand drift down between them and grasp him, stroking loosely from base to tip, squeezing and releasing rhythmically. A few shiny drops appeared on the head and she used her thumb to rub the fluid around it, watching his face as she did. He tried valiantly to keep his eyes open, but she had to grin when he failed, biting his lip as he tipped his head back.
He opened his eyes when she let go. "What-"
Anna held up the foil packet she'd retrieved from the nightstand. "You owe me, and there's no way you're coming before I do this time."
Sam nodded, maybe a little too eagerly, and said, "Yes, ma'am."
She rolled the condom down his length, noting that it didn't go anywhere near the whole way. She rubbed him a bit through the latex, then shifted off of him, leaning back a little as she peeled off the thong, awarding him with a good look at what it hid. Anna had shaved since the last time, leaving just a patch of curls above the pink lips. His fingers itched to know what her skin felt like there, and his mouth watered at the thought of tasting her again.
Knowing she was giving him a show, Anna sat back and made a production of sliding the panties down her legs. She tossed them over the side of the bed to join everything else and crawled back over him. She bent her head to kiss him, leaning close with hands braced on his broad chest.
Sam's hands went to her hips, palming her curves. He wanted her to ride him, which she seemed intent on doing anyway. There were so many things he wanted to do with her breasts, with her above him.
Anna drew back, rising on her knees as she gripped him again, holding him steady. She made an "Mmmmm" sound as she impaled herself on his erection, inch by inch, working herself up and down on the shaft before she finally settled, with him buried almost to the hilt inside her.
"Ohh," she breathed, looking a little surprised. "Wow. You're so . . ."
Anna couldn't even finish speaking. She lifted off and sank back down, eyes falling shut as he stretched her. She didn't know if she'd ever been filled like this, this deep.
"Beautiful," he murmured, watching the play of emotion on her face. "Gonna make you come this time. Gonna make you come 'til you can't take another."
"Yeah," she sighed. "Please."
After a few moments, she found her rhythm, her hands splayed on his stomach. Then he caught her hands, raising his arms to give her something to brace against, and she rode him faster. Anna threw her head back, making small noises of pure pleasure.
Sam pulled her forward a little, so that her breasts were even with his mouth. He latched onto a rigid peak, drawing it between his teeth. She shivered and ground down on him as he sucked at her, his name escaping her lips in a breathy gasp.
He let go of her left hand and reached to where they were joined, caressing her where she stretched around him. He found her clit and thumbed it and she stopped moving, inhaling sharply.
Sam released her nipple and switched sides, murmuring, "Come on, you're so close. Come for me."
Anna closed her eyes and rocked against his hand, trying not to remember when Dean had said the same thing to her, in this same position, just a few thousand miles and two years ago.
When a tear spilled from her lashes and hit his cheek, he knew he'd said something that had triggered a memory. "Sorry," he began, but she pressed her fingers to his mouth.
"Don't be," she said. "I can't run from it forever."
She bent and kissed him, pulling him up with her. He tightened an arm around her as she started to move again, his hand trapped between them, fingers still rubbing circles on her clit.
"That's-" she began, but whatever she was going to say was lost as she jerked against him, the orgasm taking her by complete surprise.
Sam watched with awed desire as she came in his arms, the first climax he'd given her flushing her cheeks and dilating her blue eyes. Her lips parted and he couldn't help but kiss them. Anna wrapped both arms around his neck and kissed him back.
After a minute or so, when her spasms had stopped, Anna leaned her forehead against his. She lightly rubbed patterns on his chest and shoulders, taking comfort in his arms around her.
"Thank you," she whispered. It was for more than giving her release, but she couldn't find the words.
He wove his fingers through the long, bronze strand of her hair and kissed her temple as she tipped her head into his hand. "No problem," he murmured.
Sam kissed her cheek, then her mouth. He slid a hand down her back, fingers dancing up and down her spine. he made an inquisitive noise and thrust his hips a little, reminding her that he was still hard as a rock.
"Gotta do something about that, don't we?" she asked. She stretched, one hand behind his neck to keep her from falling over. "Mm. I think it's your turn."
He had an idea, going back to what he'd wanted earlier. Sam slid his hands under her backside and said, "Hang on a sec."
Anna had to admit curiosity when Sam scooted to the edge of the bed and stood up, still joined at the pelvis with her. "What are we doing?"
He just smirked and carried her over to the wall by the bathroom, beyond the divider that shielded them, and backed her against the wall, as he'd done earlier.
"Oh," she said. "I like where this is going."
Sam just growled a little in response and rolled his hips, sliding out and back in. He was so strong, holding her against the wall with little more than his body. She rested her head against the wall as he pumped into her.
"Uh-unnh. Sam!" she keened.
He paused, wondering if he'd hurt her. "You okay?"
"Yeah. Don't stop." Each thrust shoved her a few inches up the wall, and Anna dreaded what her hair would look like when they were done. She laced her fingers together at the back of his neck, thumbs stroking his jaw to keep her nails from digging into his skin.
Sam bent his knees and hooked his arms under hers so that she'd feel secure and put effort into angling his thrusts into her just right. He wasn't as desperate this time, wasn't as weak or caught off guard. And he wanted to see her come, again. He lowered his mouth to hers, teeth clacking together with the force of his hips making her jump up the wall.
"You can come again, right?" he asked her, lightly sucking her earlobe into his mouth and biting ever so slightly.
"Y-yeah. Don't . . . don't stop, Sam." Her eyes rolled closed and he pumped her harder, angling in. Her little shuddery gasp told him he'd found what he was looking for and he went for it, driving at it. "Right there, yes, oh! Sam! Ah! Don't . . . don't . . . stop."
"I won't stop, gonna make you feel good. You come so pretty, you know that?"
She did know that, because Dean had told her each and every time. But Sam was just learning this, learning her. And she was learning him, too. Her legs tightened around him and her hips jerked spastically against him as the second orgasm wracked her body. Anna threw her head back and cried out, feeling the deep contractions of her body pulling Sam farther into her and the warm, wet, slippery rush of her release making him grunt.
"S'good, so good. Sammy, oh my . . ." she panted, boneless. "C'mon, c'mon and come."
He was halfway there with her, but when she asked him to, gave her permission, it was what set his brain to go and he buried his face in her neck and a fist in her hair as he inhaled sharply and came.
He stood for only a few seconds more before backing up into the bed again and falling onto his back with Anna clutched against him.
"Whoa . . ." he managed.
"Yeah," she said, muffled by his shoulder.
He reached down, between them to grab hold of the condom, praying it hadn't rolled to the top during all of that. He found it, prayers answered; and gently pulled out of her. She made a distinctly displeased sound at the loss of him and he chuckled as he wrapped the used latex in a tissue and scored a swooshing basket with it into the trash.
"Gimme . . . twenty minutes and you can . . . you can have it back." He kissed her temple and gathered Anna into his arms for a sweet, post sex snuggle.
"Impressive, young Skywalker." Anna giggled, a little giddy on her dual orgasm high, content to stay wrapped around him until she could remember her own phone number or how to hold her head up.
He whuffed a laugh into her hair as his big hand splayed over her back and rubbed softly.
It had been a long time since she'd felt this relaxed or content. For a few minutes, she just lay there in the circle of his arms, her head on his shoulder, no thoughts tumbling through her head. The respite from grief and fear had her limp and a little sleepy.
His heartbeat was strong and steady under her ear, if a trifle fast still. She missed laying like this, with her head on Dean's chest, listening to this sound. Because of the heart attack he'd had just after they'd married, when he'd accidentally electrocuted himself while taking out a rawhead, she'd spent hours awake at night over the two years that followed, measuring that reassuring thump for any change. There had been that time where he'd almost died, in the hospital in Nebraska when Mariah had been born, where machines had breathed for him. He'd survived that, only to be cut down a mere fifteen months later by a tiny piece of metal that had pierced his heart and finally stopped it.
It was good to hear Sam's heart beating, too, because for a space of two days, his had not. His chest had been still as he lay on a cot in an abandoned farmhouse . . . until Dean had sold his soul to bring Sam back. It had nearly scared the life out of herwhen Sam had gasped and sat up that night, and she'd known Dean had done something stupid and selfish and so incredibly selfless that it still hurt to think about. He hadn't asked her if it was okay with her, his wife and the mother of his child, if he did it. He'd just gone and done it, and as usual, she was left to pick up the pieces.
When she had her breath and some of her strength back, she raised her head and met his gaze. "Don't die on me," she said softly.
Sam's eyes were unwavering as he said, "I'll try not to."
She could feel her muscles already starting to stiffen and knew she needed to take a hot shower before she could no longer walk. She'd gotten out of the practice of frequent, vigourous sex, and had forgotten that it was exercise. Fun exercise, but a workout nonetheless.
Anna pushed herself upright and almost fell off the bed when she tried to stand. She snickered, sort of half-collapsed over Sam's legs.
"Okay, legs," she said aloud, "walking is not that difficult."
"You need help?" he asked.
She shook her head and made a second attempt, this time managing to stay vertical. "I'm going to take a shower," she said, as if that was somehow news.
Anna chewed on her lip for a moment, then asked, a little hesitantly, "Do you . . . want to join me?"
"Sure." He swung his legs off the bed and attempted to stand. His legs, were considerably abused and his thighs shook a little bit at his full weight. "Uh, guess I'm out of practice at that walking thing, too."
He cast a glance at the travel crib. Mariah was still sound asleep. He crossed the floor, to his duffel bag and after some considerable rifling, emerged with three condoms, still attached in a strip. He blushed a little bit when Anna made an inquiring noise.
"These, um, fit better. They're, uh . . . made for . . . bigger guys."
Now it was Anna's turn to blush. She stumbled into the bathroom and pulled a towel around her while she waited for the hot water to come up. Sam followed momentarily and wrapped a towel around his waist.
"She'll sleep through the night. Don't worry." Anna motioned with her head to her sleeping daughter, outside.
"I know." He nodded, nibbling on his thumbnail. "Remember when she was smaller? And there was that one night . . . the three of us, man, were out of our heads tryin'a get her to sleep and Dean . . ." He started to laugh, but he snotted a little bit. "Dean started singing 'Hey, Jude' out of total desperation?" His cheeks were full dimpled.
Anna laughed and clapped her hand over her mouth. "Yeah! And, and . . . you and I became John, George and Ringo, backing him up? Oh, gosh, I'd almost forgotten about that." She was laughing, now, eyes lit up. "And Mariah, she just stared at him, like she'd finally realized we'd all had it up to here and closed her eyes and boom, she was out."
"God, that was . . . so long ago. Was it really that long ago?" He snickered, leaning against the counter.
She reached in and checked the water temperature. Talking about it seemed like it was almost a lifetime ago, and that Dean would just be waiting outside the door to chime in that he sang a mean version of that song in the shower and he'd prove it to her if she'd let him.
"Almost a lifetime," she said softly, dropping the towel and ducking into the hot spray so he couldn't see the tracks of the tears making their way down her face.
Sam hesitated, briefly. He didn't know if he should intrude on her, now. He weighed his options before dropping his towel and stepping in to the shower with her.
"Sam . . ." she sighed. "Maybe you . . . shouldn't."
"I think I should." He took the bar of soap and worked up a foam in his hands, before stroking them down her back. "It's okay. We can talk about him. Don't want to forget him, do we?"
"No. Never." But she couldn't make him see how being happy with him felt like a burning betrayal to Dean. She let the water spray the makeup off her face.
"Then we won't." He soaped her up, carefully, lovingly. "But we'll live, okay?"
Anna turned and faced him.
"I will if you will." She put her hand on his chest. "You have to stop self destructing. It scares me to death, the thought of losing you, too."
He studied their naked feet for a moment.
"Okay," he promised. "You've gotta stop . . . self-loathing, then."
She swallowed back a sob, then nodded to him, pulled him into the spray with her. It washed over the two of them, like a baptism.
They were starting all over again.
Sam waited until her hair was wet enough before squeezing a generous amount of her shampoo into his palm and carefully working into suds against her scalp. She kept her eyes closed, but her hands on Sam's hips while his fingers massaged her scalp. Anna felt the hard planes of his stomach tensing and relaxing while he worked. His hand went to the small of her back, pulled her stomach to his while his other hand gently pressed her shoulder back into the water, to rinse the shampoo out.
He used his fingers gently, trying to rinse only. Anna seemed to understand that he needed to do this for her, and patiently kept her own hands, who were expert at washing her own hair, on him. Sam smoothed the thick conditioner down her wet tresses then, from root to tip.
He worked it through methodically, thoughtfully and trying to avoid any painful tangles. When he was done, he carefully washed the rest of her with the bar of soap, dropping to his knees to drag soapy hands across the insides of her thighs.
He sputtered a bit, when the spray went up his nose, but remained focused on his task. Anna said nothing, simply allowed him to wash her, feeling the heat coming from her growing arousal. His index finger ghosted by her entrance, sliding in just barely, and she shivered.
Sam rinsed her off, rinsed out her hair for her. She stretched up and kissed him.
"My turn. Sit, okay?"
He acquiesced wordlessly and she sat astride him. Anna washed his hair for him, using her shampoo again, careful to keep the soapy bubbles away from his face. He watched her, though. His eyes were big, full of wonder, yet his hands stayed at her waist like she'd done for him. This was a rite, a ritual. He wouldn't interfere.
She used the washcloth on his body, soaping it up and cleaning him off. The crook of his elbows, the backs of his ears, the half-hard erection he'd gotten when she'd moved to sit on him like this. She stood and pulled on his hand; he ducked under the water to rinse his own hair, simply because she couldn't reach for him.
Satisfied, each of them cleansed anew, Anna moved past Sam to wet her hair once more, making sure there was no trace of soap. She tipped her head into the spray and let the water work her hair down over her face. Sam brought his arms around her hips and pulled her backside flush against his pelvis. Anna gasped a little bit at the feel of him, the coarse hair he had there rubbing her behind. She choked on a mouthful of water.
"Ack!" Her hand flung her wet hair out of her eyes as she coughed and Sam pulled her away from the water.
"Sorry," he muttered. "Hazards of shower sex."
She snorted and glared up at him, mockingly. "Trying to drown me is not sexy, Sam."
"Gotcha. No drowning. Check." He smiled and pulled her around, putting his back to the water and her in front of him, facing away. "This better?"
"I like," she told him. "Nice maneuver. Now what?" She peered at him coyly over her shoulder, water beading there.
"Now, you bend a little bit, just like that . . ." He helped her move. "And I can do this." He scooted up behind her and let his hands come up and cup her breasts, pinching and rolling her nipples. Anna's hands shot out to the wall to brace herself.
The tiles were cool under her palms, giving her little goosebumps. His left hand wandered down to her center, delicately tracing her folds and the light patch of hair she'd left there.
"I want to make you come again," he told her, licking the water away from her neck. "Teach me how to get you off."
Anna's knees trembled, but she found her voice. "I like . . . when you pinch me . . . my . . . nipple. Just a little bit, not too hard, yes, just . . . just like that, Sam. And . . . oh. OH. When you use the . . . middle of your . . . fingers on my . . . on me. Little circles. Oh, mmm. Got some . . . aptitude . . . for learning on your feet, hm?"
"You have no idea."
He continued to stroke her, touch her like she directed. It was easier for her this way, because she couldn't see his face, and be embarrassed by what she was saying. Her skin was starting to prune, and she imagined that his entire back was bright red with the heat of the water on him like that.
He jumped suddenly, behind her, and whimpered.
"What?" she asked.
"Someone just flushed, I think. Hooottttttt."
"Oh, poor Sam." She snaked her hand around and grasped his length. "Anything I can do?"
"Unnmmmgnnnhhh." He grunted, pumped his hips toward her hand.
"It's been over twenty minutes, you know."
"Insatiable." He nipped at her neck and reached out of the shower for his condoms. He got one on himself, and quickly lined up to her entrance, while letting his fingers continue to play as she'd directed.
"Tease," she taunted him, wiggling a bit.
He countered by tipping himself into her, letting her feel every bump and ridge on the slide in.
"Ohhh." Her fingers sought purchase on the tile, but it was smooth and slippery. Anna leaned into it a little more, even though it was just this side of chilly, and pushed her hips back against him. He held her firmly, one hand on her hip, and didn't let her.
"Sam," she pleaded. "I need- Please."
"Tell me what you need," he purred, reveling in the clench of her around him.
"I . . ." She licked her lips and ducked her head, leaning her forehead against the wall. Truth was, she didn't know what she needed, or how to vocalise it if she did. After the first bit, she hadn't had to tell Dean what she'd liked, he just knew. Sure, they'd talked dirty to each other, but it hadn't exactly been instructional.
Anna closed her eyes and said, "Just . . . touch me. Wherever. I like being touched."
"Like . . . this?" Sam's fingers left her clit and rubbed lightly over her folds, stroking the fleshy lips around her opening.
Her fingers fluttered on the tile. "Yeah. Like that."
Sam hummed a little and nipped at her neck. Anna had noticed he was something of a biter, and she didn't mind in the slightest. He wasn't moving with any particular intent and she rocked her hips a little in encouragement.
He moved his hand from her hip to her belly and flattened it there, sliding the other up to cup her right breast. He'd always been more of a leg man than a breast man--while Dean had been a "Does it have a vagina?" man--but hers were a pair he couldn't keep his hands off of. The were big and firm, and more importantly, real, and he loved the sounds she made when he touched them. Like now, when he pinched and rolled her puckered nipple, and she made a little, indescribable noise and squeezed him tight enough that he could have easily lost it.
"Sam," she nearly whined, exasperated. "Stop teasing and do it. I was so close before, with your fingers . . ."
He slid the hand on her abdomen down to cup her mound, curling his fingers in to rub first and middle fingers over the nub there in tight, fast circles.
"Yeah, yes. Just like that." She gave a low moan and moved a hand from the wall to tug at her other nipple. "Sam. Sam, I need you . . . to move."
Sam picked up the speed, moaning a little himself. Being in the shower to do this was a little freeing, because he didn't have to worry so much about waking Mariah and he could let Anna know how good she felt around him with a little noise.
"Make me come," she begged. "Please, Sammy. I wanna come. I need it."
He fastened his mouth against the skin on her neck and sucked at her, as his fingers pulled more of her wetness to lubricate his furious assault on her clit. He couldn't believe how hot and wet she got, how well she responded to his touch. No wonder Dean had gotten so dopey about her once they'd consummated their marriage.
"Harder," she gasped. "Almost- I- Ah!"
Anna lost her breath and nearly fell as her whole body seemed to contract and then explode. She could feel her pulse pounding in her head and, strangely, the end of her nose, in time with the spasms within. She sagged against the wall and sucked in a breath. Sam made a strangled noise behind her and gave a few erratic thrusts before he let out a gutteral moan and hauled her against him as they both shook.
He pressed her close until he couldn't stand in the rapidly cooling water anymore. Carefully, he pulled out and disposed of the condom, wrenched the water off, and pulled a too-small towel around his waist.
Anna let Sam help her out of the tub, as well as wrap one of the towels around her. It fit her better than it did him, since she was so much smaller. She didn't quite meet his gaze as she squeezed past him and out of the bathroom, wet hair leaving little drops behind her as she went for her bathrobe, which had been knocked to the floor in their earlier encounter.
There wasn't a point in being shy now, but she felt a little self-conscious as she slipped into the black satin, using the towel to wrap up her hair.
Sam padded into the room, checking to make sure that Mariah was asleep before he dropped the towel to pull his underwear back on. He had less of a hesitation about nudity than Anna did.
She perched on the end of the bed and watched him. "So . . ."
He paused in retrieving his shirt. "Yeah?"
"If I had slept with Nick . . ." She trailed off, not entirely sure she wanted to ask, but knowing he'd probably answer, anyway.
"The guy comes up to my armpit." Sam pulled his tee shirt over his head. "I would have squashed him like a bug."
Anna snorted. She tied the sash of her robe and scooted back to lie against the pillows. Wordlessly, she patted the spot beside her. "How did the hunt go?" she asked. "Did you get it?"
He stretched out on the bed, almost too tall to actually fit, and sighed heavily. "Yeah. It's getting so I don't even need to read from the book anymore when I do an exorcism."
She grinned, feeling more comfortable with him now than she had in a while. Maybe the awkwardness would return in the morning, but right now she was relaxed. "I've always loved to hear you guys speak Latin. It's hot."
Sam rolled and held her flush against him. "In nomine Patris . . ." he whispered, to her ear. "Et spiritus sancti . . ."
She fell asleep to his whispered Latin, oblivious to the ancient words' meaning, but secure in the knowledge that she was safer now, here, than she had been in a building full of police.
Outside, the city remained awake and blissful in its ignorance.